Byond account and character name: DeepIndigo /(multiple characters)
Banning admin: JertheAce
Ban type (What are you banned from?): Server/Discord
Ban reason:
According to server log: Harboring info about underage players.
According to forums and discussions there-in: Organizing a cabal with the intent of discouraging Aronai from being an active presence in the community by seeing his characters permavored (I realize how dumb that sounds. The person who proposed that method supplied silly reasoning as to its efficacy that would have which at the time seemed about as reasonable as anything else on this server)
Ban length: Permanent
Approximate time ban was placed (including time zone): 14.June.2017 (Sever connect window says around 2206hrs, but for my timezone (Pacific USA/Canada GMT -08:00) it was around midday unless I'm mistaken)
Your side of the story:
Bear with me, I'm writing this after 6 months or so of trying to keep my mind off it (and failing to. It has literally eaten at me every single day since I was banned, before I go to sleep. I actually couldn't sleep for a few days immediately after, and all but quit discord because it reminds me of this fiasco too much)
I'm going to leave certain names out because by now we either all know who was involved, or if you don't, you don't need to go asking these people about it. If you're dying to know them, go read that cluster$%^& of an appeal thread I started back then at the suggestion of Ace when I tried to reach him to talk about all this.
At the time, I was fairly frustrated with a number of experiences in an otherwise rather enjoyable time spent in the community for this server ( got shouted out of the lore discussion at one point by two admins and another player for asking what I felt to be legitimate questions about the lore and what I perceived to be gaps of logic; as an example from some months prior that was already looked into by a few admins at the time and later). Apart from private one-on-one discussions with friends and an admin or two though, I'd largely just bottled it up. By the time the idea to reduce Aro's presence was proposed to me by [We'll call them "O", an apparent close associate of Aro's who in the one or two brief conversations I'd had with them prior to he mess that lead to this appeal, had lead me to believe they weren't all that close and virtually didn't talk] (leading to me organizing the cabal), I was already pretty upset.
This was compounded by the testimony I'd heard from someone who'd by then come to be a pretty good friend of mine, [calling them "J"] about some really unbecoming treatment they'd received from him over the years, even under completely different identities he would not have known, and a couple other factors I'm not getting into because it only has the potential to stir up more #$@% which I'm not here to do, I suppose you could say I was more or less radicalized at that point, and I let that get the better of me, and that was exceedingly #$%&ing stupid of me. This lead to my putting of 'O' and 'J' into contact after discussion of gripes regarding Aro with 'O'. When the "plan" (and I use that term loosely) was decided upon, 'O' brought up that they already knew of someone doing vore roleplay with Aronai [they'll be "A"] who could be "persuaded" (read: unfairly pressured due to their hesitance once they knew what was going on) to do the first "killing".
We'd later found out that 'O' had convinced 'A' to engage in the roleplay with Aro before even speaking to me the night this all went down, and when it came to light that 'O' had been the one to leak all the cabal's conversations to the admin team, and I confronted them, they tried to say it was 'A' who leaked (and were promptly disproved by a combination of log timestamp comparison and 'A' generally being a good person who was only participating due to 'O' and peer pressure anyway). In the end, everyone but 'O' was banned, which taken with the other events is pretty suspect but that's an issue for other discussions, if any. (though if memory serves 'A', thankfully was unbanned because frankly they never should have been banned to begin with since all they did was ERP someone on discord). Honestly I only mention it here for any new admins who might not otherwise be aware of the entire situation.
Later, I sought forgiveness from everyone who'd not blocked and removed me on discord without so much as a word, reached a person or two who had blocked me in order to attempt to do so (I have calendar reminders set for June 16th of 2018 Zalvine, as agreed) and had even made an attempt to two to get a hold of Aro, to no avail. Also did a fair bit of talking with Demi and Hoodoo (who was an admin at the time).
Why you think you should be unbanned:
Covered some of this above, but,
I've had six months to think about this. Six months of thinking about it every day before sleep for at least an hour. And I've spent the whole time kicking the crap out of my self for being such an idiot:
-I let mostly bottled up frustration fester into malice, and that was foolish of me
-It affected my judgement and when 'O' came in I ended up going from zero to full imbecile in seconds, then got carried away with the results.
-I took advantage of a friend or several during all that and since have tried to make amends with them. I'm immensely grateful to every one of them who's forgiven me or at least chosen not to cut ties with me.
-I said a lot of dumb &%*% I shouldn't have.
-I did some supremely dumb ^&$% I shouldn't have.
-I should have used the proper channels (admin complaint forum) for my gripes but at the time it seemed like that wouldn't yield real results.
I'm aware I was told by Ace that there was no appealing my ban in the other appeal thread, but to be fair, I have it on good authority that the first thread was not going to be taken seriously (the term "kangaroo court" was used to describe to me how it was planned to be treated more than once, by admins and friends-there-of) and it was pretty poorly executed on my part anyway.
And if my appeal is rejected, so be it, as heartbreaking as it's been to not be able to come here and roleplay as numerous characters I've put a lot of my self into. I'd like to extend a personal apology to everyone I've wrong who I haven't been able to reach personally, but especially Aronai, though I don't expect to be forgiven, in either event.
Lastly, of course, if my appeal were to be accepted, obviously, none of this %$&^ or anything similar would happen again.