Aces wrote:Someone tried to charge grand theft over a fucking stun baton.
Someone else tried to charge Grand Sabotage (which isn't even a
charge in our space law book) for setting off a weldercig (along with a catalogue of other trumped-up charges that should have amounted to misuse of comms
at best), then when the person being charged ducked through a hand tele portal to avoid them an officer chased them - into space. The HoS then tried to add murder for them
and the person they were with when the weldercig went off.
FAST FORWARD TO LAST NIGHT.
Sec was Zodioc as warden and Scree as detective. The QM made a bunch of dirt/smoke grenades and mailed them to several departments, before tossing one directly at the warden, and running to fling one at Scree too (Ashley caught it, it went off in her face).
Naturally, when she tried to run past Scree, this happened:
Naomi Black is cackling madly.
Naomi Black yells, "Oh man, totally, TOTALLY worth it!"
Scree chirps. Sticks his foot out.[Security] Zodioc Marina says, "I have the perfect cell for her..."
Naomi Black faceplants!
Naomi Black yells, "... ow!"
[Common] Carly declares, "Hello!"
Scree chirrups, and casually... sits on the bunny. "'eya, Zod."
[Common] Hannah Hermia yells, "Hi!"
Naomi Black now has a monster on her and... oh god there's the warden.
Zodioc Marina coughs more dirt, glares at the bun.
Naomi Black says, "Uhm... hey, uh."
Naomi Black says, "... wuh oh."
Naomi Black asks, "Soooo... heh... got all of you?"
[Security] Zodioc Marina asks, "Snatch her headset, yeah?"
Zodioc Marina talks into the security radio headset
Scree chirrrups. "See, the 'hing 'bout stirrin' trouble, is when I does it, I does it fully expectin' fer someone ta get their own back wi' some time... inside 'em.
Scree casually plucks the bun's headset from her ear.
Naomi Black says, "... wha-... nu-..."
Scree is trying to take off a supply radio headset from Naomi Black's left ear!
And a fun time was had by all, you can probably guess the rest.
These sort of antics are generally best done when there's predsec*, though. I mean, technically we could have pressed charges, but - Vandalism? Disturbing the peace at a
push? Maybe you could count minor assault if you were reaching? Even if you add all three them together it's worth less than fifteen minutes** and brigging them for a pittance of time then kicking them out into the halls again is no fun for anyone, whereas swallowing them down into squishystomach and kneading on them for the rest of the shift while "losing" them in the penal system is far more entertaining for all involved.
* Scree Security Tip: if you're not a hardass about the little things with the rest of the crew, the rest of the crew are more likely to turn a blind eye to a bit of "illegal holding".
** Another Scree Security Tip: if the charges are worth less time than the charge of resisting arrest, it's probably not worth the effort chasing after them unless you're
really bored.
Or hungry. Just set them to arrest and pick them up if you bump into them, certainly don't go wasting your time tearing the station apart to find them. If they disappear into self-imposed exile to avoid arrest and you never see them again,
Security was successful!Disclaimer regarding Scree Security Tips: Scree is the opposite of a by-the-book cop, he can barely read any book above the level that features colourful dogs.